My goal is... I'd like a career of something.

Let's start with my career from my previous "lifetime". I am slowly starting to realize that I was a conundrum in the classroom. A "Geographical Oddity" of philosophies, if you will. Until I began to study Education in College, I believed whole-heartedly that teaching was my calling. From as early as I can remember, it's what I wanted to be. As a matter of fact, it was kind of like the family career. My mom is a teacher. My Uncle is a teacher. What would be wrong with being a teacher?

Nothing, if I fit the mold.

Ohhhh, but since when have I ever tried to fit a mold? My first and foremost divergence from the mold, I now realize, was the fact that I do not have the "Bleeding Heart Liberal" sentiment that seems to be the nature of many teachers. Now, I don't mean this in a bad way. In fact, I think it's what a teacher should be. A teacher should see the good in every student, the potential, the spark. But I can't. I see the world as a place where everyone has "their place". Some people are meant to be Doctors. Some people are meant to be brilliant Novelists. Some people are meant to be a CEO, a Lawyer. Whatever. Some people are meant to do the heroic work. The Teachers, the Firefighters, the Policemen, the Military. And some people are just meant to do the work. You know, build a house, fix a car, ppave a driveway. Bag the groceries. Pump the gas. It's not degrading. It's a job. A job someone has to do. Certainly, and I am being totally serious and honest here, the world would cease to function as we know it if everyone decided they were too good to do these jobs.

But that's where the Education System is headed. We are training our students and their parents to believe that everyone has an equal shot to be a Doctor or a Lawyer or whatever White-Collar job they want. And that just isn't true. Yet somehow, we've become conditioned to believe that if we don't let Tommy take Algebra like everyone else, he'll feel inadequate and never try to rise above the bar. Listen, I can tell you from first hand experience that Tommy felt worse trying to do what everyone else could do when he couldn't, all because his parents refused to believe that their son wasn't as capable as the rest of the kids. There's no shame in not getting Math, or not being good at English. There's no shame in not understanding Spanish. I firmly believe that for 90% of the population, the fact that they are not good at one thing (IE School) means that they are good at something else. So why do we insist in Education on treating everyone like they have the same brain, all the while cleverly disguising it under the guise of "Differentiated Instruction", so that to the outside world it looks like we are teaching everyone equally. News Flash! We're really not. We're just soothing egos. We're taking the hard stuff out of the equation for the less capable students so that everyone can say they passed Algebra (yes, pun intended). As if the fact that you gave Tommy a "B" in Algebra is really going to get him through College. Tommy is going to spend thousands of dollars of his parent's money partying his way through Freshman year, just to drop out and end up where the Educational System refused to admit he would end up. At a job that does not require a college education. And it will be hard, but he can make ends meet. He may not own a Million Dollar home, or a Brand New Car. But he could. He could if he found his niche and worked hard enough. That, my friends, is the American Dream. You work hard, you get rewarded. This whole notion created by the Educational System that everyone else is going to work hard to make things easy for you is a disaster waiting to happen. Give it 20 years. You'll see.

My second, and much less troublesome deviation from the teacher mold was the fact that I couldn't just follow the book. Noooooo Sirree, the book never had just the right lesson. I needed it BIGGER and BETTER every time. So, I spent far far too much time creating more work for myself by brainstorming grandiose schemes for Lesson Plans. Which then led to grandiose amounts of work for me to check, which no one ever did anyways. So why did I torture myself so?

And let's not forget the parents, whom I so slightly touched upon in describing my first deviation. Parental Interaction had a tough mold for me to fit in because I just plain wasn't going to give in. I made my rules and I stuck to them. And the more you tried to strong-arm me, the more the rules seemed set in stone. Every teacher knows how to give wiggle room. Every teacher knows how to take wiggle room away when it isn't deserved. And you telling me that I am wrong, that your son deserves to take a test over , or should get a second chance on his Notebook Check (in Algebra Honors) because he has an IEP that "clearly states" he is disorganized will certainly not win you any Wiggle Room. Why not, you ask? See my first deviation from the mold for your answer. If your son can't take the heat, don't put him in the Kitchen. Don't tell me that your a Superintendent and you've "never heard of teaching that way", and that it can't possibly be true that I teach "that way". I don't take kindly to name dropping, or prestige dropping, as it may be. I'm Passive-Aggressive. That means I sit silently, yes-sing you to death, letting you think you've won, when really, I've already planned a retaliation against you so perfectly executed according to the rules that you can't argue with me when you lose. Oh, and you will lose. But, see, teachers shouldn't think that way. Teacher should only have nice bones in their body.

Now I have clearly laid on the line the fact that I just wasn't cut out for Teaching. My heart just wasn't in it. And I will honeslty tell you if you ask, that I think I never gave it my all. I never felt right about Teaching, so I never put myself into it full-throttle. Sure, I had great ideas. But my steam always ran out half-way up the hill. I had dreams of glory every First Day. And by the end of the First Week, I was counting the days to Christmas Vacation, strategically plotting sick days just to get the most out of the one perk of my miserable job. Even things like Women In Technology, a program I truly believed in and wanted so badly to be an intricate part of, became just another escape from my real job.

Alas! Don't fret My Dear Reader. For I now know the reason that Teaching was so difficult for me. I was in the wrong institution. And I was in the wrong field. It's no secret, I can crunch numbers. I love Math. But do I have the knack for explaining it to a bunch of 15 year-olds? No, not really.

You know what I CAN explain, and elaborate on, and extend into any situation? Do you know how I can be all that I can be? I'll give you a hint. It's not the Army Reserve. I'll give you another hint. I'd be in a college. I'll give you a third hint. I'm going to start my own school in a college. Pick any Liberal Arts Institution. I'll establish my school there. We'll work out just how to use the Degree later. But, by golly, this is it! This is my dream. My perfect job. The one I can go to everyday, without using another sick day ever again.

Drum Roll please.
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My Dream Job is to be a "Professor of Pop Culture Quotology".

C'mon, take it seriously for one second. Do you know the talent and dedication it takes for a person to speak nearly half of their conversations using quotes from songs or movies? Do you know the incredible amount of brain space it takes for a person to remember where they saw "that actor" first? Or what song was really that bands first single?

And, yes, obviously, I've already planned for Matt to be the Dean of Admissions into my new School. Somebody has to be able to interview the applicant in proper "Quotology" style.




P.S. Was that "more words" enough for you, Mr. Anonymous?????