The First Day of the Rest of My Life

As I get older one thing keeps occurring to me.

I am all set with Drama in my life.

There was a time when I was an emotionally charged youth, full of angst and ready for a fight. I wasn't afraid to hurt people by making it clear how I felt. I wasn't willing to tolerate people or get to know them if I decided I didn't like them. Well, come to think of it, perhaps that whole following your First Impression thing isn't a bad idea. I have mentioned that very rarely (in fact only once) have I ever been misguided by a First Impression. So, while perhaps being so cruel and blunt wasn't right, maybe my feelings were.

Anyhow, the point is I've lost a lot of that angst of my youth. Sometimes I wonder if that's a bad thing. I just can't seem to bring myself to speak defiantly or with intensity anymore. I just don't care about all that drama. I love to discuss, I love to debate. I love being intellectual about things. I love Adult Conversation.

But my need for Drama has been drastically reduced. Yes, I look back on the Good Ol' Days, sitting on "The Porch" Friday Nights, listening to and sharing dramatic stories about work and dating and people we were angry with. And I sure loved a good nail-biter. I also loved hanging out in the Center of Town, with "The Band", and getting involved in all that nonsense. But moving away and moving on may have changed me a bit.

Is it that I've grown up, really? Is it that being a mother has changed my persona? I don't think so. I think it's more like my environment has changed, and I've adapted with it. During that adaptation, a lot of the things that used to get me all fired up just seem so petty now. Pretty much it's that life has been so peaceful for so long, I don't really want to go back to the craziness.
Anyhow, this is a lot of explaining just to announce the fact that I have resigned from my role as Chair of the Family Support Group that I was heading. I am just so sick of it all. Maybe it's the fact that it's not "fun" drama, if there is such a thing. It's petty drama, from a bunch of women who all want to have their own way like little five-year-olds. They all want to be "Captain of the Closet", and if they can't, they threaten to take their ball and go home. Not to mention the fact that everything gets done without me knowing (like gifts to sailors, meals to families, obtaining a Tax ID), and I look like an idiot at the meeting announcing something and then being corrected because nobody tells me what they've done. Seriously, it's not like I want to be involved in everything but a simple "Hey, we did this..." when I send out the email asking for Agenda items isn't too much to ask, is it?? The problem is that everyone wants to be the center of attention, and to be the one who has all the news and does all the "Important" things. Would you believe I was actually told that I wasn't informed we were sending meals to a particular family because "Only a select few needed to be involved"?? I could go on and on, but like I said , I don't care about Drama anymore. I'd rather just simply state "I'm all set with this." than give the million reasons why I can't stand the group anymore.

I've thought long and hard, wondering if this make me a quitter. I'm not really sure what everyone else would say, but I've decided for myself that no, I'm not. I've tried so hard to keep the group running diplomatically, to give everyone a fair chance, and to ask to be informed about the important things, you know, things you plan to announce at meetings. It got me nowhere, so I'm done. People can say what they want about how I never should have done it in the first place if I couldn't handle it, blah blah blah. Whatever. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be a part of something you think is important, finding out it's a bunch of crap, and quitting. I shouldn't have to feel like I have to stay when I've clearly decided I pretty much hate it. So, say what you want, I don't think I'm a quitter. I think I've tried something I thought would be a good idea, and it turned out to be crap, so I'm done. It's makes me someone who at least tried, and at least I won't look back now and wonder what it would have been like.

Confessions of a Cold-Food Lover

I have a confession to make.
I have a secret indulgence, and it has nothing to do with Pregnancy.

I love Cold, Left-over Chinese Food. Any item. General Tso's, Crab Rangoon, Sweet N' Sour Chicken, Fried Rice. Whatever. I love it. I get up "The Morning After" and can't wait to open the fridge, stand over the counter, and devour forkfulls of Cold Chinese Yumminess. The Hubby thinks it's gross. Is it? Am I so wrong for loving my Leftovers cold? I mean, you eat cold pizza. (Another favorite of mine, but far surpassed by the Cold Chinese). It's not that different, is it? The food's already been cooked. Popping it in the microwave is just a formality. And, quite honestly, the microwave pretty much ruins the consistency of whatever it reheats. So why bother?

Am I alone here?
Am I the only one who's ever felt this way? (Gratuitous Music Quote!!!)

The Rock I've Been Hiding Under

It doesn't have a specific name, just a general label called "Being Busy". With what, you ask? Oh, nothing, really. Some weeks it's shopping and appointments and meetings. Other weeks it's spending time with family, taking much needed pregnancy naps, going to Birthdays or Baptisms. Then, of course, there's always the cleaning and the weekly commitments. Where does the time go??
The only time that doesn't seem to be flying is the weeks of my pregnancy. I swear, I am going to be eternally stuck in my First Trimester. Morning (or All-Day, as my hormones would have it) Sickness and Afternoon Energy Drains included. No cravings, though. Well, nothing like with James. James wanted Spicy Foods non-stop. This baby wants Filet O' Fish one week, extra sauce and pickles. The the next it's Frosted Flakes. Another week it's pasta. Strange. Yesterday was funny though. At my Grandmother's Birthday Party, I think I single-handedly devoured the plate of pickles. And not even Claussen. Just regular old Dill Pickle Spears. I wonder if anyone noticed???
Next week my Mother-In-Law is coming out from California. She says it's been about 80 all week there. And sunny. Because it's always sunny in Southern California. It really is an amazing thing, to go out there at Christmas Time, if you are a New-Englander. You've never seen anything like it! Beach weather (well, for us anyways) at Christmas!! It's going to be quite a shock coming here! Anyways, when she comes out it's going to be BUSY BUSY. We're going to the Cape (Martha's Vineyard) for two days. Probably just to stroll around and shop. When we come back it's Halloween. That's going to be fun! For Halloween, I am dressing James up as Steve from Blues Clues. He has the Green Striped Shirt and a Notebook and everything!
What I need is a Mommy Day. One day to run freely and not be called home. I'd also settle for a week where I didn't have to leave the house. Is that possible?

You Gotta Know When To Hold 'Em...

...You gotta know when to Fold 'Em. And it looks like we'll all be Folding 'Em". Man, I am so depressed. I just don't understand it. Well, I do understand it. It's how Politics work. You sneak a little Law in with a Bill that people really want to pass. Then later, when it's a success, you claim to have spearheaded the campaign. I've been doing a bit of research about the effects of this Anti-Online Gambling Bill. It seems that what they will really go after is the ability for the Casino Companies to use any sort of Electronic Funds Transferring, including Credit Cards and Electronic Checks. I've also read (or heard, can't remember which) that there still will not be any law specifically banning Online Gambling for the American Consumer. They are just making it illegal for companies to take your money. Therefore, most companies have already pledged to stop operating in the United States.
What I really do not understand about this is why the Government isn't taking the opportunity here to cash in on this huge industry, rather than prohibiting it. From what I understand, they are planning to use technology that will prohibit online transactions from occurring. So, why can't they simply find a way to use technology to impose some sort of Luxury Tax on each Online Gambling Deposit? It's bound to be a HUGE profit for the Government. You could tax at a rate of 5%, getting a Dollar on every $20 people deposit. I don't think the general player will mind, seeing as most sites give a Deposit Bonus anyhow. They won't really lose any part of their $20.
And, why aren't more Online Gambling companies using their huge profits to organize a protest against this insult to our freedom? Are they really going to bow out of this Gag-illion Dollar Industry, because of the accusation that they are "Ruining the Families" of people that can't control their gambling problems? Since when did America's knack for indulging in un-healthy practices ever guilt an industry into folding under the pressure? Do you see McDonald's closing down because people sue the company for making them fat? Do you see Cigarette companies stopping production, even though they KNOW without a doubt that cigarettes are deadly? Heck no! The people who run those companies are too busy bribing our Government, and raking in money hand-over-fist to care what their industry does to the American People. And you know what? Good for them!!! Why aren't the leaders of the Online Gambling Industry following suit? Do you mean to tell me that they honestly believe it won't change life as we know it? Take the WSOP for example. Might as well kiss that goodbye. Do you really think that without the sponsorship of companies like Party Poker that they stand a chance of staying in the spotlight on ESPN? No way. But that's what I don't get. Online Poker has permeated every home I know of. How can the companies that offer it possibly be willing to give it up?

I have read, however, that BoDog and someother sites do not intend to give up their Online Poker operations in America. I've always been a fan of BoDog. Now, I know for sure they'll never lose my loyalty (even if their Casino does rob me blind).

Oh, wouldn't you know, the Congressmen that pushed the original Anti-Online-Gambling bill is none other than Congressman Bob Goodlatte, from the lovely state of Virginia. (Note to Family: Don't count on me bringing any Tourist Money to your stinkin' state!!!)


SIGN THIS ONLINE PETITION!
http://www.petitiononline.com/LOGNOW/petition.html





Here are some articles I found about the Online Gambling Ban:

http://www.crushthetables.com/onlinepokerlegislation.html

http://online.casinocity.com/news/news.cfm?ArticleId=67957

http://www.bbc.co.uk/worldservice/learningenglish/newsenglish/witn/2006/10/061004_gambling.shtml

http://msnbc.msn.com/id/15118962/